>the tour

>It’s been an interesting morning. Colchester is the finish of the 7th Stage of the Tour of Britain cycle race (it finishes completely tomorrow in London). There have been road closures and lots of bicycle-related events in the town centre.


As a local VIP I was invited to attend a Civic Reception to mark the start of the day’s festivities. Actually, the reality is that they invited lots of people, including some religious people and I was on the list for some reason – the only way I am a VIP is if the ‘i’ represents ‘immature’.


Back to the reception. It was very pleasant – tea / coffee and cakes. This was followed by some speeches at the stage at the finish line to mark the start of the day and a walk around Castle Park in Colchester to see all the bicycle-related activities.


Several interesting things will remain with me:


One was the look on a little girl’s face when she was presented with a prize for a competition she’d won. If I had taken a photo I could have subtitled it: ‘immense pride’. She beamed, and the rest of us beamed back.


Another was seeing one of the young people from our church riding her bike in the park, along with about 150 others from schools around the town. It was a moment of mutual almost-recognition. She looked different with a cycle helmet on. I must have looked different in sunglasses. We looked at each other. Paused. Smiled tentatively. And then waved and said ‘hello’ when we were sure who the other person was.


The third thing is that I have signed a pledge to cycle more frequently. That will have a positive effect on my fitness, on the environment, on travel expense claims and I suspect a different effect on my, erm, seat. But I have pledged and intend to try to keep to that pledge.


What do I learn from all of this? To revel in moments of joy – really celebrate them. To look hard for God in all things and all people and try to recognise him. And that good intentions are not enough – sometimes we need to get on our bikes.

Bike jokes

Two blokes are riding along on a tandem, when suddenly, the one on the front slams on the brakes, gets off and starts letting air out of the tires.

The one on the back says: “HEY! What are you doing that for!?”

The first chap says, “My seat was too high and was hurting my butt. I wanted to lower it a bit.”

So the one in the back has had enough. He jumps off, loosens his own seat and spins it round to face the other direction.

Now it’s the first guy’s turn to wonder what’s going on. “What are you doing?” he asks his friend.

“Look mate,” says the rider in the back, “if you’re going to do stupid stuff like that, I’m going home!!”

Jack and Jill have just climbed Le Alp de Huez, one of the steepest peaks in the Alps on their tandem.

“Phew, that was a tough climb” said Jill, leaning over, breathing hard. “That climb was so hard, and we were going so slow, I thought we were never going to make it.”

“Yeah, good thing I kept the brakes on,” said Jack, “or we’d have slid all the way back down!”

A very devout cyclist dies and goes to heaven. Saint Peter meets him at the gate. First thing the cyclist askes is if there are bicycles in heaven.

“Sure,” says St. Peter, “let me show you,” and he leads the guy into the finest Velodrome you can imagine.

“This is great,” the cyclist says.

“It certainly is,” says St. Peter. “You will have a custom bike and the best cycling clothes you’ve ever seen, and your personal masseuse will always available.”

As they speak a blur streaks by them on the boards riding a gold plated bike.

“Wow!” the cyclist exclaims. “That guy was so fast that can only be Lance Armstrong!”

“No,” says St. Peter, “that was God on the bike, but he thinks he’s Lance Armstrong.”

A pedestrian stepped off the curb and into the road without looking one day and promptly gets knocked flat by a passing cyclist.

“You were really lucky there,” said the cyclist.

“What on earth are you talking about! That really hurt!” said the pedestrian, still on the pavement, rubbing his head.

“Well, usually I drive a bus!” the cyclist replied.