Have you ever had the feeling that you have bitten off more than you can chew? The sense that you have over-reached yourself? That you are batting further up the order than you should be? The feeling that you are a fraud and are about to get found out?
I had that sensation last week. We have started two new series at CBC. In the mornings we are considering ‘I ams’ of Jesus. No, not dried cat food, but the different ways Jesus revealed his identity and his mission by saying “I am…”. Yesterday we began with “I am the bread of life.”In our evening services we have started a series looking at David before he was king. This is where I felt I had bitten off more than I could chew. Perhaps it was the medication I was on but as I sat in my study looking at my open Bible and an empty piece of paper I wondered whether it was too late to do something easier – like a nice series on the Beatitudes or the Sermon on the Mount.
I can’t remember the thought process that led me to consider that this was a smart thing to do. As I looked at the passage (1 Samuel 16:1-13) I realised that this was beyond my understanding and felt poorly equipped to deal with it. I did not even have many commentaries on the subject. All I could see were words that told an interesting story but I could not see how they applied to me or the good people who would gather together on Sunday evening to listen.
Then I realised that the thought process did not matter. The inadequacy was normal. The blank paper was how I always start my sermon preparation. The inspiration does not come from me, it comes from the Author. He has already put the words on the page and has promised to help me to highlight the ones that matter to his people here. I just have to ask, be open and be ready.
Now I am not claiming that this sermon was then awesome. That somehow the words flowed miraculously and that at the end of it there was a round of applause from the angels watching from heaven. But I did feel able to relax. I was not in this alone. It only seemed a daunting / impossible task when I tried to do it with my own intellect and understanding. And the words from the passage resonated loud and clear with me:
People judge by outward appearances, but the Lord looks at the heart.
Phew.
The elderly pastor was searching his wardrobe for his favourite tie before church one Sunday morning. In the back of the wardrobe, he found a small box containing 3 eggs and 100 £1 coins.
He called his wife to the wardrobe to ask her about the box and its contents. Embarrassed, she admitted having hidden the box there for their entire 30 years of marriage. Disappointed and hurt, the pastor asked her, “WHY?”
The wife replied that she hadn’t wanted to hurt his feelings. He asked her how the box could have hurt his feelings. She said that every time during their marriage that he had delivered a poor sermon, she had placed an egg in the box.
The pastor felt that 3 poor sermons in 30 years was certainly nothing to feel bad about, so he asked her what the £100 was for.
She replied, “Each time I got a dozen eggs, I sold them to the neighbours for £1.”
nukelearfishing 
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