surprise!

Yesterday was a day with several surprises. One was something I should have been expecting and the other was an invitation to do something, which came out of the blue. (More about this after it has happened next year.) The thing I should have been expecting was the arrival of a book I had ordered a long time ago. It is a book of modern parables and psalms: written by people in Baptist churches.

It’s called ‘Bible Messages for Today’ and I will probably be quoting from it a lot. There are a couple of entries in it from me, which is probably why I only ordered one copy, but there are some brilliantly imaginative and powerful entries. Get your copy (or copies) from here. I hope it’s okay to share an entry or two with you… consider them free samples!

Just to be safe, I am sharing my entries with you, but don’t let them put you off: there are lots of better ones! They are sort of poetic psalms – psoems? polms?

My church gave me an asbo for shouting during prayers

They said I was disruptive: I said I didn’t care

My church gave me an asbo for crawling under pews

They said it was distracting – untying people’s shoes

My church gave me an asbo for singing the wrong words

They said it was disgusting: I thought they were absurd

My church gave me an asbo for laughing far too loud

They said it was despicable: I felt rather proud

My church gave me an asbo for sticking out my tongue

They said I’m disrespectful: I was having fun

My church gave me an asbo for running in the aisle

They said it’s dangerous for a seven year-old child

In the beginning was the Word

but we refused to listen.

In the beginning was the Word

but we were illiterate.

In the beginning was the Word

but we misspelt him.

In the beginning was the Word

but we didn’t speak his language.

In the beginning was the Word

but we turned him into a sentence.

In the beginning was the Word

but we preferred our own words.

In the beginning was the Word

but we were into moving pictures.

In the beginning was the Word

but we changed the subject.

In the beginning was the Word

but we used him as an expletive.

In the beginning was the Word

but we queried his grammar.

In the beginning was the Word

but we put him in a PowerPoint presentation.

In the beginning was the Word

but we abbreviated him.

Be blessed, be a blessing