optimistically disappointed or disappointedly optimistic?

I am delighted to say that I am finally back home. I have had some new holes made in my body that I didn’t have last Friday. In order to patch them up the hospital have stapled me back together. The repairs look like I have some small pasties breaking through the surface of my skin! (Think of the crimped edges rather than the meat and potato contents!!)

I am now battery-powered as well. In order to try to stop the headaches from which I suffer the skilful surgeon at the National Neurology Hospital in London has inserted an Occipital Nerve Stimulator. This gadget (which has been inserted into my tummy and is wired to the nerves in the back of my neck) sends a low voltage pulse into the nerves in the back of my neck. Eventually this will persuade the nerves in my head not to send out pain messages (we hope). It can take up to three months to show any effect, which is disappointing as I was hoping it was going to be an instantaneous effect.

So I am optimistically disappointed or disappointedly optimistic. I think it is the former as while I am disappointed not to have an immediate effect I am still hopeful that it will work eventually. I think that this is different to being disappointedly optimistic as that suggests that my optimism is diminished or is a cause of sadness.

I find that it is difficult not to be optimistic when I am a follower of Jesus. He was the most optimistic person ever, even when his friends deserted him and he was on trial for his life he refused to give up. He knew that the outcome of his efforts was worth the pain, agony and separation that he was experiencing. Nothing we go through compares with that. This does not mean that things always work out okay for those who follow him (which is a misunderstanding of Romans 8:28 – ‘And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose’).

There are bad times and sometimes we do not see a positive outcome from our efforts. I recognise that it is possible that my headaches will never stop, but that does not diminish my faith in Jesus and still hope and pray that they will cease. God works for our good even though we cannot always understand how.
Pastie stories:
True story: Near Penzance ‘airport’ there is a public road that runs across in front of the runway. As you approach the road there used to be a sign that warns of low flying aircraft with the word ‘DANGER’ underneath it.

At the other end of the road, after you have gone past the runway is another sign that says, ‘DANGER PAST’. I love the fact that some Cornish wit has added ‘IES’ to the sign!

A man walks into a bar and asks the Barman for a pint a lager and a packet of crisps. When the barman served him the man drank the pint of larger and placed the packet of crisps on his head, then turned around and walked out of the pub.

The same thing happened on the following two days. On the third day the man ordered a pint of lager and a packet of crisps.

The barman said “Sorry mate, I can serve you the drink but I can’t give you any crisps as we have run out!”

The man said, “Ok, then I’ll have a cornish pasty instead.” He drank the lager and put the cornish pasty on his head, turned around and started to walk out. Just as he got to the door the barman called out: “Why did you put that cornish pasty on your head?”

The man replied, “Because you’ve run out of crisps.”

Yes, that may be the lamest joke ever, but it is a joke about pasties and they are not easy to find!