dum dum daaaah

Peek-a-boo 1Well, that moment you have been dreading has finally arrived. No, not the moment when you have to write all your Christmas cards, or even dragging the tree and decorations down from the loft. It’s the moment when I resume blogging on a more frequent basis than recently.

Amazingly I have actually had complaints, and they were not about the content of the blog – they were complaining that I have not released bloggerel into the wild recently. Oo-er missus!

Some of you may have seen the bloggage I posted yesterday about discrimination. That is something that has been festering in my brain for a while and finally emerged in some form of semiconscious drivel. But I have also been thinking about the nature of this blog for a while and have decided to introduce a new innovation (is there any other kind?).

I’ve been wondering what to call this new page that will appear and have discarded quite a few unsuitable ones in favour of ‘Irreverends’. The idea is that that page will contain stories (usually the names will be changed to protect the not so innocent) of the disasters and bungles that I and my fellow clergy people have not managed to conceal. If any of you have any offerings for this section of my website I will be very pleased to receive them: you can either post them as comments or send me an e-mail.

In order to launch this I thought that today I would mention some spoonerisms. I’ve always enjoyed spoonerisms, perhaps it is the wordplay or perhaps it is the fact that they are attributed to Rev Spooner in the first place who (by way of example) is alleged to have called for a toast to the “queer old Dean”. I’m not sure how many of those attributed to Rev Spooner are genuine so I will be attempting to post some more original ones.

I am a big fan of U2 and think I may have discovered a hidden meaning behind one of their songs when I was singing along in the car and accidentally ‘spoonerised’ it. Apparently the song is about trying to find your way out of a labyrinth: “she moves in wisteria maze”.

How about the classic Scrooge line, which takes on a new lease of life as a spoonerism: “Hah, bumhug!”

Perhaps the more embarrassing and potentially disastrous spoonerism came when I was conducting communion in our church. Thankfully most people were either so caught up in the moment that it did not bother them all were too polite to respond, but there was some sniggering from the music group, when I recited the familiar words, “in the same way Jesus took the sup after cuppa.”

As I heard myself say those words I realised my error but it was too late to stop them from coming out of my mouth. Rather than leaving them hanging in the air I corrected myself instantly in the hope that this did not make matters worse.

That’s the problem with words. Once they have left our mouth, or once we have hit “send” they are gone, they are loose: instantly becoming feral. We cannot unsay them. So it is well that we heed the advice we find in James 3 and use our tongues to praise God and build other people up, that way we would need to worry about the negative effect of our words of other people.

Be blessed, be a blessing

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